I’ve read it’s important to show respect for your baby via Montessori teachings. This includes asking for permission and receiving consent, but how do we get consent from a baby that can not talk? From my research and my own experience as a mother, here is what I’ve come up with on how to show respect for a baby.

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Show respect for babies by asking for permission

Asking permission and proceeding with consent. This concept, I feel, is also setting him up for understanding consent. He doesn’t always have to give his grandma or me a kiss just because we ask for it. Though it is innocent and brings us joy, he may not feel the same way. I don’t want to send him a message that says if someone you are not comfortable with asks you for a kiss you should kiss them and vice versa.

Maria Montessori would go as far as to say we should ask permission to change their diapers. That seems a little much but I do catch myself doing it or at least announcing what is happening and why; especially during those times it doesn’t seem as if consent is given.

“I’m going to take you out from your crib and change your diaper so we can go play”

“I’ve got to put a new diaper on you so don’t pee all over yourself”.

Does it keep him from gator-rolling? No, but I feel better. Does he? I’m not sure but at least I’m not being aggressive with him and we are laying a foundation for consent and understanding.

I try to think about the golden rule. I definitely wouldn’t want someone forcing me onto my back, ripping off my clothes, then squirting butt cream in my crack. When putting it this way, maybe Maria Montessori doesn’t seem so silly after all.

Give choices to show babies respect

Yes, I let my 9-month-old make choices and he has been for months. We started with books. I know his favorite book. We’ve read it a million times. For fun one day I gave him the option of what book to read and he actually chose his favorite. Now, he has grown very fond of Greg Paprocki’s books so you can see a struggle when deciding which one he wants.

Because I know he can make a decision I let him pick between two outfits (unless I have picture plans which are almost always..). Whether or not you believe he is making choices I’m giving him the respect to be in charge of something. This will grow his confidence and reassurance in himself to make choices.

We are not in the terrible-two stage yet, so many of you may want to let me know how impractical this idea is. I get it. I’ve heard from family and friends. However, this is where I am currently. Personally, I’m not sure I want my child to fall in line all the time. I want him to know he has the right to tell people no. Call me crazy, but this may be a topic for a different day, or give me a few years to rewrite this choice section.

Observation without interruption shows respect

Lastly, observing also gives our budding babes respect. Babies are in a constant state of learning which includes deep concentration. We may not realize but what we do can have a long-term effect on them and their confidence. By allowing them to concentrate uninterrupted and not helping them all the time, they are learning to problem solve and to believe in themselves. If someone was constantly correcting how you did things, how would you feel? Incompetent or apprehensive? You may even lose respect for yourself.

By observing them at play, we too can learn what it is they are learning. We can then find activities that can help them grow with the stage they are currently in.

If you are like me, the first time I read that we need to show respect for babies it threw me for a loop. How do I show respect for a baby? I hope these 3 ideas help you to find your own ways to show respect for babies and if you have any ideas of your own please share them in the comments below!